Makibishi: Annoyingly Addictive & Completely Weird Browser Game

THIS ONE IS going to be a little hard to explain. It all started with my stumbling across a site called “Makibishi Comic“, which turned out to be some sort of online Flash based point-and-click adventure from one of those insane Manga-esque Japanese software houses. This isn’t the first Japanese browser game I’ve featured here at the site, but it’s certainly the weirdest.

A cursory look at the site and you really have no idea what it’s all about, even when you select the English version. Pretty quickly it becomes obvious that this is one of those simple point and click style affairs, where you advance through various quests from screen to screen, but within about 5 minutes of playing this little gem you begin to realise just how different this thing is. In fact – I’m betting you haven’t seen anything like this before, I know I hadn’t. The general objective of the game is to solve a series of clues/puzzles in order to locate five missing people, each search representing a different screen or area within the game.

So – what’s all the fuss about then? Read more

What Exactly Is The Point (Of The U.S. Senate Vote Today)?

THE NEWS sites are buzzing today with the latest announcement that the US Senate has voted to approve a bill which requires US troops to be withdrawn from Iraq within 11 months.

This latest development follows a vote in the US House of Representatives which makes further funding of the war in Iraq conditional on a timetable for a US troop pullout, but here’s the rub…

This Democrat-sponsored bill will now go before President George Bush for approval, but of course he has said he will veto it immediately. Point blank. End of story.

So perhaps someone (stateside) can explain to me what the point of the House of Representatives and Senate bringing such a bill in front of Bush is exactly? Perhaps I don’t understand the subtle nuances of the American political system enough or maybe I’m disadvantaged because I’m observing the proceedings from the outside looking in (from Europe)… but I just don’t see the point of all that effort when the President can – and will – simply veto it.

I mean, it’s not like the veto will come as a surprise to anyone now is it? Is this just some wasted effort for posterity so the history books can record who was on which side of the debate?

Can someone explain this to me please? Thanks.

Disappearing Honey Bees – Billions Vanishing Without A Trace?

BILLIONS of honey bees in the US and Europe have disappeared in the last year or so, as in vanished completely. No dead bodies. No evidence. No nothing… just a very very large absence of bees. This phenomenon was first noticed late last year in the USA and has been christened “Colony Collapse Disorder” by the scientists. I know it sounds like some science fiction introduction, but this is actually happening for real and it’s got a lot of people very worried.

So, why should you care?

Well, those honey bees are used to pollinate fruits, crops and nuts on an annual basis. In the US alone this crop is estimated to be worth approximately $15 billion (€11 billion), however this problem is not just limited to the US, it’s happening in Europe as well. This phenomenon is also putting a large dent in honey production and has the science community across the globe truely puzzled. Read more

Stormtroopers Don’t Have To Die Virgins Anymore!

THERE’S FINALLY SOME HOPE for all you stormtrooper geeks out there; you know who you are so don’t deny it! My favourite dont-give-a-shit country has come (no pun intended) up with a great new service, just for you.

A Dutch escort agency called Society Service has just launched an offering designed for virgins; and in particular they are getting a lot of interest from IT geeks. Well I suppose it was obvious really; Virgin + IT Geek = Stormtrooper. Damn – another use for algebra that I didn’t expect!

Apparently every booking lasts three hours minimum. Longer is possible upon request (and I assume with the associated dosh) but you can’t get any shorter sessions. The escorts in question use the three hours to take a bath together, do a massage and explore each others bodies. “When the date is over, you will have had a fantastic experience, and you will be able to pleasure a woman” - according to the blurb.

No mention of whether or not the ladies will dress up for you in the Princess Leia gear, but I’m sure some accommodation can be reached for the appropriate fees. It looks a little pricey from their website, but damn they have some interesting options to consider!!!

So – there is hope for you 30+ year old virgins after all. What the hell are you waiting on? Go book a flight and get yourself sorted; then maybe you can put those stormtrooper helmuts away, stop wasting your time buying and seeling collectibles on ebay and actually go outside and get to meet some real women, if you’re lucky enough!

Once piece of advice for you though… I wouldn’t bring the helmut with you

The Five Excuses

I’VE HEARD lots of excuses in my time, from many different sources but essentially they all boil down to a few nuggets or variations of the same. Lately I’ve been working with some folks who shall remain nameless for now (you know who you are!) and I’m pretty much convinced they have managed to exercise every single excuse in the book, everything I’ve ever heard in my 20+ years in this business they have managed to dredge up in the last few months… and the worst of it is they are still trying to contrive even more.

Every missed deadline, every missed deliverable has an associated – and ever growing – list of imaginary excuses attached to it. In fact, I think they might possibly be the most incompetent and disingenuous bunch of folks I’ve ever had the misfortune to work with!

Still – rather than get depressed by this (because I’ve passed beyond that at this point) I was reminded of a wonderful excerpt from the BBC comedy series Yes Minister (thanks Anto!) where some wonderful excuses are articulated and I decided to reprint them here today for the hell of it, or at least to have a small laugh at the insanity of things.

Oh and if you’re wondering who she is on the left there… that’s my Excuse Police Officer; it’s a special division (in my head anyway) where I imagine her in my minds eye every time I hear another line of bullshit from someone in the form of an excuse – and try to just laugh it off.

Hey, a guy has to get by somehow right?

So – to set the scene, the following exchange takes place between Jim (The Minister) and  Humphrey (The Senior Civil Servant) in relation to a gross waste of expenditure in the public sector:- Read more

Antidote For Rolling Stones Lifestyle

THE ROLLING STONES are coming to Slane Castle this year, August to be precise, and I think I’ve just come up with a brilliant solution for any neighbours or locals who just want to avoid the whole rock & roll thing for the duration. It would certainly cut down on the numbers of complaints during the shindig…

Right about now I’ll bet you’re wondering what the hell a manic horse has to do with this. Well you see the Rolling Stones are also doing a gig in Belgrade soon, playing to approximately 100,000 punters, but locals are worried about the nearby Belgrade racecourse where up to 300 horses are currently stabled. The poor animals will have a terrible time of it during the concert so the boffins in Belgrade have come up with a proposed solution to deal with the potential noise issue for the horses – they intend to drug them into oblivion. I guess the idea of actually moving the horses somewhere safer for the duration hasn’t occured to anyone yet; obviously drugging them makes soooo much more sense. Score one for morons humans and zero for animals if this goes ahead.

So basically 300 horses will be stoned out of their minds during the concert, while a bunch of pensioners on stage will be in pretty much the same state.

Obviously animal lovers have an issue with this and are objecting, but it’s early days yet and the decision is still pending. Still, it gives me some ideas for our own upcoming problems in Slane. With a capacity of approximately 80,000 it’s sure to be a loud, insane and drugged affair anyway, so why not dope up the locals on some horse drugs and let them sleep through the damn thing? It could be the perfect antidote to the rock and roll lifestyle!

Mind you it’s also nice to see nature getting it’s own back on humanity for a change too. Over in Canada it seems those lovely seal hunting bastards chaps have been stranded in the ice flows by some unseasonal weather; up to 100 boats are seemingly stuck out there in the ice. So I guess that’s 1-0 to nature and the animal world.

The Happiest Place On Earth?

DID YOU KNOW that Denmark is actually the happiest place on this planet of ours? I didn’t – until now that is – but more importantly do you know why?

Last year (2006) the Danes managed to come top of a survey which mapped the happiest places on Earth, based upon asking 80,000 respondants across the globe a series of questions and then mapping the resulting data. This year the Danish have done it again. A recent survey of 200,000 respondants across Europe has resulted in the Danes taking the number one slot for wellbeing and happiness.

Ireland managed to crawl into a respectable third place for the happiest people and a reasonable fifth place for the most satisfied people in Europe. Other nations fared much worse however; the most miserable Europeans are the Italians and the Portuguese – which is surprising given the culture, weather, location etc.

Still – Ireland is not without its own problems and now that a General Election is looming I figured it might be a good time to give some pointers… Read more