If It Has Tires Or Testicles…

OH HOW MANY times have I heard a sentance starting with those immortal words “The Trouble With Men Is That...”, but this time I received a little gem in my inbox from MaryMac which goes some way towards explaining the anti-male feeling out there.

After all – not everyone can be as lucky as us men!

Men are just happier people, but as SusiQ constantly tries to remind me,  what else can you expect from such simple creatures?  Still, the reasons we men are happy are many…

Our last name gets to stay put.  The garage is all ours.  So is the study. Wedding plans take care of themselves.  Chocolate is just another snack.   We can never be pregnant.  We can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.  We can wear NO shirt to a water park.  Car mechanics usually tell us the truth. There is no such thing as ‘too much’.

The world is our urinal (damn I love that expression).  We never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.  We don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.  We do the same work but get more pay.  Wrinkles add to our character.   

People never stare at our chest when we’re talking to them.  New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle our feet.  We have one mood all the time. We can read maps and figure out GPS locations to the nearest three metres (we just can’t fold the maps up properly afterwards!)

Our phone conversations can be over in 30 seconds flat.  We know stuff about tanks.  A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.  We can open all our own jars (well, sometimes).  We get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.  If someone forgets to invite us, he or she can still be our friend.

And it gets better… Read more